As I lay here in bed at 4 a.m. Sunday morning listening to the freezing rain pelt the bedroom window. The end of the week news just like the weather in mid-April is not what I wanted to hear.
Last week started with putting Heaven’s Vineyard, our cottage in northern Michigan on the market. It was a bright sunny day, even though there was about two inches of snow on the ground. But the weather this time of year isn’t totally unexpected in northern Michigan and neither was putting our cottage up for sale. Our sons are grown and away at college. Vinny Sal and I are looking to enjoy life daily and not just on weekends with a three and half hour car ride with two pups in the backseat. We had plans with the proceeds from the sale of our cottage.
(an excerpt from my prayer journal 4/9)
joy is found
never can be sold
Last Monday was my birthday. It was pleasant enough and I had taken the day off work to enjoy peace and quiet. The day was gray, dank and snowing but still relaxing with a delightful book in hand for a future book review for this blog. It is how anyone who knows me would expect me to enjoy my birthday.
(an excerpt from my prayer journal 4/10)
the sun shines
on the day after
I found joy today in the office. Yes! The office! Because I work with fantastic people who decorated my little cubicle, a birthday card signed by all, and beautiful, delicious cake.
Last Wednesday was my first day at physical therapy. It was all around a difficult day in mind, body and spirit. More theory than answers to the diagnosis. It wasn’t unexpected and neither was my friend’s response.
(an excerpt from my prayer journal on 4/11)
You know where I found joy today?
I thought it was just the robin belting out a song this morning amid a slight snow shower in spring. Joy could have stopped right there but at the end of a long, difficult day there was more joy to be found.
Some days are difficult to get through for whatever reason. But I found joy today in a friendship I have had less than two years. She is in a ‘class’ of strong women in my life that know and when I need an encouraging word and sometimes when I need to be talked off the ledge, so to speak. We all need those types of friends and I am grateful for her today. And sometimes these friends don’t even know the joy they bring… but now they do… I at least I hope they do.
Last Thursday the last line in my prayer journal before heading out to the office was this:
(an excerpt from my prayer journal 4/12)
“Where will I find joy today?”
At lunch time, I took a short walk outside and in my prayer journal I wrote, “JOY! 69 degrees, balmy breeze and sunshine!”
In Michigan, the weather can be 69 degrees midday and by nightfall a blizzard. The drastic change in weather seemingly in hours is to be expected.
At 4 p.m. the unexpected did happen. As everyone at the office huddled into the conference training room, the company announced it would be ceasing operations nationally and we all had a job and a paycheck for at least the next 60 days.
I went through a similar scenario in the summer of 2009. While still shocking I did not shed a tear. I did not feel a sense of overwhelming panic like I did that July 9 years ago. What I did feel as I looked around the room at many faces of varying degrees of age and looks of disbelief was sorrow. I deeply understood the internal wave of panic, the many questions without answers, and the sense of failure although unwarranted by either company or individual.
Friday, the 13th. Where would joy be found?
Friday was the second day of physical therapy and no less daunting and exasperating.
(excerpts from my prayer journal 4/13 throughout the day)
It’s Friday the 13th. Many people find this to be a “bad” or an “unlucky” day. But for those who intentionally look for joy will find it even on today.”
no love lost
wishing time away
Yes, it is Friday the 13th and then this happens… It is not the birthday present I had hoped for this week, but there is still JOY to be found in all the wonderful people I have met here. They are the BEST people I have been associated with in my career.
Then Saturday, time to think (and write)
(excerpt from my prayer journal 4/14)
There is joy today in the soothing sound of a steady albeit a cold rain. Spring will arrive eventually as well as the joy in mind, body and spirit. Joy always seems its’ purest when radiating from a bright yellow sun against the bluest hue of a cloudless sky. Yesterday is done. Today is beginning and tomorrow holds the joy of opportunity.
Where there is joy there is hope. And where there is hope, we thrive.
Back to today, Sunday, the start of a new week
As I continue to lay here like lead in the waning night time hours writhing in bodily pain with still unanswered questions of my own future, I know this one thing. In mind, body and spirit, I will find joy in each day.
Every day is like the weather in Michigan. The unexpected will happen. But there is joy to be found. I remember many years ago when I was going through my own job loss panic, one of my colleagues said to me, “Do you have your family?” Yes, replied. “Is everyone healthy?” Yes, I replied. “Then you have everything you need.”
I have a God and a family who loves me. I’m not dead. I’m alive. Yes, I have everything I need for mind, body and spirit.
As for my colleagues who are my friends, I am reminded of Psalms 27:17:
I’ll write the question again. Why is joy so important?
Where there is joy there is hope.
Where there is hope, we thrive.
When we thrive, others thrive.
The Blogging Owl
The Joyful Journey is a blog series. This is the second post in the series. I will be blogging pages from my journal on where I have found joy. All blog posts will be stored in the category labeled #TheJoyfulJourney.
I hope you will join me on this expedition of finding joy. Not only finding it but sharing it with me and the followers of The Blogging Owl. Whether in posting a comment on The Blogging Owl page or have a guest blog spot on The Blogging Owl (email me at Hoot@TheBloggingOwl.com).
P.S. I will be back to posting book reviews and other stories of the nest soon!